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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
When I got home last night, my wife demanded that I take her someplace expensive.
… so, I took her to a gas station.

and that's how the fight started.


I tried to talk my wife into buying a case of Miller Lite for $14.95. Instead, she bought a
jar of cold cream for $7.95.

… i told her the beer would make her look better at night than the cold cream.

and that's how the fight started.


After retiring, I went to the Social Security office to apply. The woman asked me for my
driver's license to verify my age. I realized I left my wallet at home and told the woman
I would come back later.

The woman said, 'Unbutton your shirt'. I opened d my shirt revealing my curly silver hair.
She said, 'That silver hair on your chest is proof enough for me' and she processed my

When I got home, I told my wife about my experience at the Social Security office. She
said, 'You should have dropped your pants. You might have gotten disability, too'.

and that's how the fight started.


My wife and I were sitting at a table at my high school reunion, and I kept staring at a
drunken lady swigging her drink as she sat alone at a nearby table.

My wife asked, 'Do you know her?' 'Yes,' I sighed, 'She's my old girlfriend. I understand
she took to drinking right after we split up those many years ago, and I hear she hasn't
been sober since.'

'My God!' says my wife, 'Who would think a person could go on celebrating that long?'

and that's how the fight started.


I rear-ended a car this morning. So, there we were alongside the road and slowly the other
driver got out of his car. You know how sometimes you just get soooo stressed and little
things just seem funny?

Well I couldn't believe it.... he was a DWARF. He stormed over to my car, looked up at me,
and shouted, 'I AM NOT HAPPY!!!'

I looked down at him and said, 'Well, then which one are you?'

and that's how the fight started.


I took my wife to a restaurant. The waiter, for some reason, took my order first.

"I'll have the strip steak, medium rare, please.' He said, 'Aren't you worried about
the mad cow?'

'Nah, she can order for herself.'

and that's how the fight started.

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