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So I decided to go fishing with Baldzilla this morning. We meet at the ramp and are loading his tackle into my boat when I hear this rumbling coming from his gut. “You alright, man”? I asked.

“Yep, just got a load to lose but I’ll be alright” he said, so off we went.

I normally like my full enclosure on mornings like this when it’s in the mid 20’s when we’re cruising at 30 mph…but not this morning. Nope, Mr. Baldzilla decides to make things interesting for me by frequently ripping them out. I said he should drop trou and hang it over the side or use a bucket I have to unload but he insists he’ll be ok.

With zero wind this morning, there was no escaping the poison vapors he was producing while we were fishing. He was too embarrassed to unload in front of the two other boats that were around us. I must have been the first person in the world to feel sea sick when it’s slick as glass out. All along, he insists he’s ok and can wait until we get back to the ramp.

After a few hours of fishing, we decide to head back. He’s starting to have a bit of a panic look on his face at this point but still says he’ll be ok.

Two thirds of the way back to the ramp and Baldzilla is grinding his seat like a Salsa Dancer on a hot Havanna night. “They do have a bathroom there, don’t they?” he asked. I wasn’t sure at this point..I just wanted to end this misery I was in.

Back at the ramp, he jumps off the boat and runs up to a small building where he’d assumed there was a bathroom. My phone rings and it’s one of the ladies at the office asking me about some problems she’s having at work so I’m trying to help her out. From behind me I hear someone moaning “Hey man, I need that bucket…hurry…”

I turn around and see ol’ Baldzilla running back to the boat…well, it wasn’t really running per se. Have you ever seen someone walk very fast without bending their legs?

Meanwhile, I have this lady on the phone and Baldy is yelling “Hurry man..hurry! I gotta take a $hit and need that bucket”. I could tell she didn’t know what to make of the background conversation.

So I go into the cabin and dump out a bucket I have with some old trolling lures in it and prop it up for Baldzilla to use. I hop off the boat and turn my back to give him some level of privacy. All I can hear is his natural noises and followed up by some manic laughing on his part.

When he’s done, he puts the bucket at the end up the ramp while I go get the truck. But then along comes Walleye Pete pulling in and I guess Baldzilla didn’t want him to see a bucket of $hit on the dock so he stashes it inside my cabin (which I didn’t know until after the boat was loaded and I had to go in the cabin for some gear.
He threw the bucket away finally…along with his dignity. This gives new meaning to the words "Go before you go". The lessons we learn while fishing, I guess.
 

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I'm REALLY glad I was called out of town for work and couldn't go with you guys! Baldzilla seems to have an unusual affinity for doing things with/in buckets.

Baldie, I like the "stash the bucket in the cabin" move!
 

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I'm searching but can't find the s**t eating grin emoticon.
Betting your Salsa dancer's expressions were similar to this :sweatdrop: or this one :pinch:
followed by boldout... funny stuff.
 

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:high5::high5::high5::high5: That is a funny story right there. We talk about $hit anxiety all the time before we go on trips. Everybody else takes care of business before we go and I'm always the man left out. Only the guys that fish sunrise to sunset on smaller CC's know what this is about. I don't know maybe we should move this to the conservation board.
 

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I had a guy on the parker one day that shocked me.........we were in breaking fish, carrying on a conversation about something and all of a sudden he said he had to go.....before I had a chance to grab the bucket or even move he had his A## over the side and didn't skip a beat with the conversation......he was talking as if nothing was going on.....my god the guy was really reaking havoc on the breaking fish, he was prepared with a towelet in his pocket......he finished up business and fished on......i couldn't have done that....!!! That guy was a real man!
 
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